A "lil" stressed

I suddenly feel a lil



envious



of those whose birthdays are in
December.
I don't know why exactly am I feeling this way,
maybe because of the stress that I'm having,
and the pre-aftermath, if there's such word, lol.
And maybe because the songs I'm listening to now,
all by Lisa Ono.
Sigh I feel so calmed.






You wouldn't want to talk to me
if you knew that I was busy
BANGING my poor piano earlier
cuz of the frustration  -------  my exam's friggin tomorrow.
And i don't effin care.
I'm just gonna do my best, and whack whatever I can for my solo
in my jazz piece, "Night & Day".
Like I care how it would sound like now. Grr.





I'm tired
and
my brain is apparently in "sleep" mode.
So yeah.
I guess that's it for today.
I'll post up something more positive some time soon.
As soon as I get my final final final final final exam done,
and get myself happy.
:)





I need to shop, to make myself happy.
No, I'm not a shopaholic, and I'm not a potential one,
so don't worry. :)
I just need to breathe.
Damn.

You only live once

Aaaah...



There goes my final piece of,
chocolate.
*nom*
:D
I feel calmed and all, but not excited and hyper. LOL.



Since yesterday, I've been eating a lot of carbs and chocolate.
Gooohh.
Spaghetti, instant noodles*it's been a while... lol.* and chocolate that is. :D
I eez happy!
By the way, it's actually the first time I cook spaghetti like this,
with tuna, garlic and other seasonings. lol.
Interesting........
I shall cook that again when I get back to hometown,
where the resources are always available.
And even when they're not,
I can always walk to the Giant Hypermarket to get all the ingredients I need
with just around 10 minutes walk.
No pain. Hence no gain. *grin*





The chocolate was actually to calm my disturbed mind.
Honest.
My piano, one of the keys is ... faulty.
I can't play properly with that note,
because whenever I hit the note, the other key would hit with it,
causing a dissonant sound, which I don't like at all.
Dai kirai desu. :(




Hmmm.
I need to practice.
Exam's coming, it's tuesday and wednesday.
I can do this.
I've grown, so I must act like one too.
Though I've encountered some obstacles along the way,
I can do this, with not only my persistence, and also GOD's help.
I'm so doing the last minute thing. Hahahahaa.
Blame me not.
But I will do my best and get this done and over with.
:D





Me eez strong!
So I will do my best,
and shall have absolutely no regrets.
Because I know that time is unforgiving.
:)





::  p/s  ::
Btw,
I've been watching a jap drama,
"Attention Please" nowadays,
and I love learning new japanese words
whenever I watch one,
and..... learning different life lessons
when I watch one.
It's nice. Overwhelming, yeah..

Me eez HYPER! :D

I AM HYPER

LIKE MAD

LIKE EXTREMELY HAPPY

cuz of many reasons

but

definitely not because of

redbull.

:P

Heh sorry

but I'm not really a fan of redbull.

ANYWAY!

I've just finished one of last two exams

of the semester,

Performance studies (2).

Though the whole semester was

somewhat alike the one last year

and what I've been through

along with my classmates

were overwhelming.

Come to think of it,

I've almost forgotten the way

Eric teaches us in class

was actually benefiting us

though the process may seemed otherwise.

Hehehehe.

Well, the outcome is always worth looking forward to.

:D

But it's too early to say so.

Hehehe.

I have one more exam to go,

remember?

Anyhow,

I'll do my best

and get my exam done

with satisfaction.

:D

I can do this.

Gosh I still feel so thrilled.

and

loved.

Yay.

:)

::  p/s ::

I'm going to watch

"Twilight saga - New Moon"

TONIGHT!!!

TONIGHT!!!! OMG IT'S TONIGHT!!!

:D

yeah i'm whining :P

My left arm.
hmmm..
The whole limb actually.
I can barely play well with my left arm like this.
Thank GOD I don't play much with my left arm.
Sigh.
Why???
Why muscle spasms now???
Owh... that includes my right feet and my right pinkie. meow.
It hurts whenever I hit the "c" note like four times in a bar, and there's like four bars.
TT_______TT
And........
Both of my shoulders muscles.
Le sigh.




However,
That means I'll have to rest kaw kaw during this sem break. :D
Me eez looking forward to my sem break! wee~
Okie I'm done with my practice....
So I will turn in earlier today.
Sigh. Sad. Pain. Tired.





But me eez having fun with samba, despite the fact that it's really hard to get it right.
Yum samba~! X)
It's 2 days away! (Performance studies) oh wait, 1 day away! aaaaahh!!! *PANIC*
Hmm.
Yeah.
I can. I can. I can.
PRACTICE~~~~~

me eez not feeling good NOW

I don't like stress.
I mean, for most of the time, yeah.





It makes me feel like shit.
It made me wanna curse
and throw tantrums to random people.
It made me feel sleepy in the end, making me feel as if I'm escaping from my current situation.
No time to worry for my aching shoulder,
no time to feed my appetite because I'm simply not in any mood to eat.
What in the world is going on now.
I'm like this all because of stress, not worth it, I know.
But it's hard to control your emotions when you're under stress, okay?
Oh maybe i know, it's because of something that is going to happen,
in fact, a lot of things are going to happen within 2 weeks time.
Sigh. All because of the procrastination and my laziness durh.






Enough crap.
I'm leaving, and going somewhere I feel like to.
At least I won't feel so stressed out when I'm on a journey to somewhere.
There will always be songs playing in my head anyway.
Take care.

I can barely breathe. As my energy became scarce..

I can hardly feel anything, but the coldness,
My vision is blurred and I literally am numb.
I mean it.




The only thing that made me feel like I'm alive
was
blasting my mind with Paramore's songs.
Ah well. Their songs are great.
Love all of them, but I love "You are the exception" and "Misguided ghosts" the most.
I don't know. Hahahaha.





Maybe I'm just tired.
Yeah...
It's okay. It's time to put my mind into my projects anyway.
I'm so lazy.
TM is fine, CH and Arranging are KILLING me........
Sigh.
Composing and arranging are not easy.
Oh, finally, I'm feeling something,
Stomachache.
LOL.
I hope everything will be done and I wanna get over with them.
Everything man.
Everything.
Ever since yesterday, I've given some thoughts even though my mind was in turmoil.
Yeap.
I can live with this.



All the best, peeps.
Exams are coming.
Keep on practicing.
:)))




::  p/s  ::

My right hand is getting weaker.

Oh no.